Tuesday, May 10, 2005

WooHoo!

A part of my job is to scan international forums, newspapers for economic trends and other such boring crap. My image of an average American. I know all Americans are not like this, but still it is fun to 'Think like an American.'

Howdy, I am an American dude. Long live globalization. We just wanna ensure that you get the same quality stuff as we do. WTO is only for your good. I want you to use the products made by an American company. Drink only Coke (or pepsi), eat only from McDonalds (or subway), wear only Nike, should buy only Dell computers, listen to only american music and watch only American TV channels. It is for your own good that you have to open up your economies. Buy oil only from American oil companies and drive only Ford. Fly only Boeings and attack your neighbours only with weapons made in the USA. They will also use the same weapons because they have to protect themselves, you see! Don't buy any aeroplanes from Airbus because they are made by the French (spit on them). If it weren't for us you would be speaking German, you ungrateful ingrates.

NO! I won't tolerate trade agreements. They are fair only when we open polluting factories in your third world country. Only talented americans are brilliant enough to do other jobs. The jobs should stay only here. We wan't your money only, not the skirt wearing, curry eating, turbanheads. Don't open anymore software companies, or call centres. Those are jobs are meant only for Americans. Shoo! SHoo!! Globalization is acting against the interests of the American people. BRING USA OUT OF WTO and the commie, new world order shit called United Nations. UN is useless, just look at how corrupt that Kofi Annan's son is. He is fully responsible for all that happened in that damned Iraq. Now look at North Korea and Iran. They are making nucular bombs only because UN and that commie China is helping them. (What? China is our ally now?) OK, not China, they are good people. Psyche! they are bad because walmart outsources to them and walmart sucks.

Go back to your Bombay in Hindoo-istan, you stinking rag-head. I called an AT&T call centre and they forwarded me to some thick accented bitch who couldn't understand anything I said. So I just abused her and told her some racial jokes. I could hear her crying, ha ha ha! Suits you, bitch.

Just don't become commies or we would bomb you back to stone age. Wait, there ain't no commies no more (grin). Ah, yes, you are either with us or you are against us, so we will bomb you back to stone age along with the rest of the axis of evil. You will feel the full heat of the Crusade(TM) in the name of our God, Lord Bush. We will torture^W abuse your men, kill unarmed civilians and call them terrorists but we will not subjugate ourselves to the Geneva Convention. We won't agree to international laws because they are anti-US, so screw your Human Rights, you undemocratic pigs. You are just jealous of our freedom and progress. Maybe we should invade your country, kill all your leaders and convert you to Christianity.

Thank You, have a nice day.
God Bless America.

Whoa! I scare myself.

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Blogger JBG said...

That attitude is very congruent to things I read as well.. Big business rules but you have to wonder what will happen as the EU and China begin to develop thier industries more effectivly the position will change.

May 13, 2005 3:09 pm  
Blogger sarah the great and wise said...

Ouch! That smarts. I know you put a disclaimer on the top of that but I have to say not all of us are that arrogant, soulless, and just generally self centered. That is, however, the image that the media and government in America portray without fail and usually without meaning to. Sure makes me proud to be an American. (just in case you could not tell, that last bit was sarcastic)

May 13, 2005 4:50 pm  
Blogger TAotB said...

http://manojar.blogspot.com/2005/05/woohoo.html#comments

Wow is that an interesting view of America. Are you sure you aren't just furthering such stereotypes and prejudices? Just like you are accusing Americans of doing?

Among other things, one of the basic principles of American society is freedom of choice. The whole idea that you use only products made by Company X or Nation X is anathema to our culture. You may chose whichever products you want from whatever source you want. Of COURSE companies try to convince you to use their products. Don't they do that in India? If you or your compatriots chose to listen to American music or buy Coke or wear Nikes . . . how is that an indictment of my society? If you don;t like it, don't do it. Would you rather not have the option? Would you rather the gov't step in and make a law telling you that you may not use/listen to/wear/watch/eat/drive/fly in/talk to people and things from other countries? If so, I am sorry you feel that way. We will continue to accept and allow products from all countries.

And for those areas where OUR gov't has decided to restrict imports, etc., I am sorry. It does not happen too often, but when it does (e.g. Chinese textiles or foreign steel), I wish it did not. I have posted many times about free trade and how I despise trade restrictions. What about you? How do you feel about trade restrictions?

If all Americans are against free trade agreements, why is Bush pushing hard right now for Congress to pass CAFTA (the Central Amerian Free Trade Agreement)?

Do you truly think that all Americans are prejudiced? That's too bad. Yes, some are. Just as some Indians are prejudiced against Americans and others. It's a sad fact of liife but every culture has people like that.

Want to know my position on the "outsourcing" trope offered by the Dems and some protectionist Reps? It's a lie. Click here and here. See also,here, here, and here for more.

For myself, not speaking for the rest of "my fellow Americans," I do think the U.N. is more trouble than it's usually worth and that Kofi Annan's son (and others) are corrupt. (See here and here for examples.) Do you not think so? Do you think that the Oil-for-Food problems are fake and that Saddam did not use his oil sales chits to curry favor with foreign gov'ts and the U.N.?

You seem to imply that Americans think that the U.N. is the source of trouble in Iraq/Iran/N. Korea. I don't think that's true. Seems to me that foreign terrorists (Saudi, Syrian, etc.) are the trouble in Iraq and that an insane dictator is the trouble in N. Korea. As for Iran . . . well, the whole "stop trying to make nukes or we'll threaten you with considering a strongly worded statement" doesn't work. Has it ever?

Regarding "calling the AT&T call center," are you saying that all Americans are racist?

As for the "with us or against us" . . . um, how would you have us approach terrorists? Play nice with them? Yeah. That's worked so well for Italy. How do you want to treat terrorists?

You also seem to think that our resistance to laws which are anti-U.S. equals the denial of human rights to others. How's that again? Because we want to excercise sovereignty over our own country therefore human rights take a hit? When India promotes her right to self-rule rather than the imposition of outside rules on her, does that mean that human rights are hurt?

May 20, 2005 12:48 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What ever u have said is crap. If you feel that jobs should not be outsourced to India or Indians so what. Its only your fellow Greedy american companies who outsource to cut their cost...first ask them not to outsource or u stop dealing with companies who outsource than harrasing fellow human beings.

August 25, 2006 10:34 am  

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